Howdy to all who read!
I just got caught up on reading all entries of this blog!! This is a major accomplishment as I haven't read since probably two weeks before finals week last semester. Since then, I've graduated, spent 5 weeks working in Brazil, spent the rest of the summer in a temp job, and now have started grad school in the UK at Lancaster University.
It is quite a blessing to find words of needed encouragement from blogs that were written earlier in the year. I am glad I saved it for now ;)
I have recently come to the conclusion that I am truly not a very good individual. My heart and my mind war against God - and I have no idea how to give them over to Christ. I believe I have only come to realize this because I am now in a new setting. I guess I am going through many new emotions as part of being in this new setting. As I have started attempting to analyze why I feel the way I do, I've come to find some ugliness in my heart. I am quiet bothered by all this and even more so because I don't know how to change. It is a mindset... almost as though it were some sort of prejudice one grew up with (although not quite). How does one get rid of years of thinking in a specific manner? Could yall be praying for me?
Evelyn
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3 comments:
Absolutely. You will be in my prayers.
The inner battle for control of your heart continues even after the commitment to follow Christ is made. It's brutal and crushing to see the mess of our own lifes. We hurt each other and blacken our own lives so often, so regularly, so easily. But only in honest examination will we see it! He is the light. In Him there is no darkness, and darkness flees from His truth. You, however, are standing in new light. Light that you were unwilling to immerse yourself in before. THAT requires vast courage. Practically, I would encourage you to open yourself to a good well-known Christian female friend on the matters you see, and dedicate yourself to enduring the refining fire that God demands. Remember that our fight is not against flesh and blood, but against the unseen powers of this present darkness. Stand unafraid beside your true Lord, and take the Deceiver to task. Go kick his butt.
Grace and peace.
Thank you for the encouragement!
Thank you for the encouragement!
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