Leaving your Mark vs. Leaving a Bruise

When I stop & think, I recall times that I've laid people to waste. No, I wasn't a great football player. No... I mean with my words. Honestly, I don't remember hurting people when I was young. Maybe I just don't remember my youth with clarity and honesty. Unfortunately, most of the pain I remember inflicting has come more recently. Perhaps this is because my words now weigh more than they once did because of the much greater intensity of relationship I now experience. Perhaps I'm worse, less thoughtful, less holy, than I once was. Perhaps my eyes are being opened more clearly to what I say and how I say it. I'm not sure. But I feel like I've been leaving a lot of bruises lately.

When I stop & think, it is easier to pick out the times that I think I've left a positive mark. I remember a study partner who confided her pain with hometown churches. Just discussing those hard times and giving comfort was worth the time. I remember first comforting my (then future) wife regarding fearful revelations being made to her. And there are other moments I've honestly and openly attempted to encourage and uplift. I've even been told of a moment I gave loving correction, which was rejected by the receiver and reported to another, who properly took those painful words (about him) with humility as an exhortation, and urged him on to reconcile with God. He's still God's child.

Do you easily forget leaving bruises? And easily remember leaving your mark? I do. Why is that? Is it extraordinary pride? Or is it God's grace, his free offer to remove guilt? I honestly don't know.